Cake Pops? Seriously?

Starbucks is now offering cake on a stick.

Cake on a stick? Seriously?

You can call it a cake pop all you want. It is merely the next sign of the fucking Apocalypse, you bastards. Are we really SO lazy that we can no longer use the traditional methods for cake consumption, which were, last I checked,
a. a fork
b. bare hands, or
c. face planting

Do we really need to add d. spear it with a stick, to the list?

Maybe we can all pretend we are great cake hunters, out there in the wilds of suburbia, hunting down and spearing the elusive cake balls, and devouring them right off the skewer.

Yes, that is it. Look out for the next reality show, Cake Hunters.

*sigh*