Overwhelmed

I woke up this morning completely overwhelmed. Last night was too much, too soon, too fast, I guess. After being locked in Neutral for twenty-one years, to suddenly have the gears changed to Overdrive was more than I could handle. I woke up worried about my adoptive dad. Is this going to upset him? Should I be so happy? Will he think I am going to forget him? Abandon him? I was in tears off and on all day today. Eight days to my birthday. I found them just under the wire.

My mother called tonight. We talked briefly, then she had to go. I am sitting here, wondering if she is going to call back. It is after midnight.

I guess not.

My father sent me email letting me know he has sent me some things for my birthday. I am going to get a birthday present from my father. From my father. That sounds so strange yet so wonderful.

I have relatives. People who are actually related to me. I have always had a family, but no one before me who was actually related to me.

I am completely overwhelmed.